Girl at the signal

It’s a busy Monday afternoon. Cars are zooming past us. We are at the crossroads, waiting for the signal to turn red so that we can cross the damned road safely. The ‘we’ here includes my pretty friend and me. It’s the first day of the week and we are hurriedly out to grab a quick bite.

It is almost impossible for a girl to stand at the signal and not to be noticed. While we are waiting at the signal, trying to shield ourselves from the unrelenting afternoon sun, what I see leaves me highly amused. Inwardly, I chuckle. Almost everyone is sparing a look at us. Every boy, every young man, every uncle, every old man in the cars wheezing past us, on the bikes, in the autos is throwing a glance in our direction unfailingly. Some are trying to catch our attention rather openly, some are peering at us from under their lashes, some are coyly looking at us, and some are shamelessly sticking their head out of their window to get a full view of us, while some others are craning their necks to a threatening degree to get a good view of us.

In that moment, I understood some things, characteristically male. Actually, those ‘some’ things were always kind of obvious, but in that moment they became crystal clear to me. I am listing them down here:

• Age of a man has got nothing to do with how he perceives a girl or a woman. Most men have that hungry look in their eye. The look that says…oh-so-I-can’t-touch-you-but-what-the-heck-I-can-at least-gape-at-you.
• Most men, age no bar once again, will not miss out on an opportunity to check a girl out, no matter what circumstance.
• If a girl is standing in a public place, men feel it’s rude on their part to ignore her. So they feel it’s their right to check her out very openly. They will shamelessly gawk at her, and won’t even take their eyes off her, even when she looks right back in their eyes.
• Men feel that if she is standing on the road, she is demanding to be checked out.
• Men will not fail to check unknown girls out on the road, even if they are accompanied by their partners. The partner will in turn sneer at the object of her man’s supervision.
• Men will even make adjustments and even go out of their way to get a clear view of the girl on the road.
• It doesn’t matter if the girl is pretty or not. But if she is average looking or slightly better than average looking, things only get worse for her and more interesting for those leeching men.
• Some men even have innate virtual rape ability. They can rape you even by just looking at you.

No, this is not an angry post. I am just amused. Women are undoubtedly prettiest of the God’s creations. But oh boy! Seriously the kind of attention we get! Most of it is unwanted. It’s just makes me curious how men think. How openly they check us out without even battling an eyelid!

I am not saying attention is not welcome. It is. But only from desirable sources. Girls seek attention, and I will agree to that. No point being two-faced about it. But only from only those people who they fancy. Not from every prick, and definitely not every roadside Romeo.

To me, this has happened several times. Some leeches have even hooted and passed deriding remarks. Wonder if this has happened to you?

What’s wrong with our TV?

Very real Reality Shows

Ok, so there is nothing interesting happening on TV. Whatever is being churned out is highly mediocre, predictable and unintelligent. Reality shows are hardly real. Their larger than life portrayal is what makes them that much more difficult to digest. The plots, the dramatic music, the twists, the turns, the fake fights, the scandals are all well thought out and well rehearsed. Every tear that is shed on a reality show is scripted and well practiced, to the extent that the exact moment when the cameras will face the person shedding that tear and wipe it very, very aesthetically is decided. But most of us buy that, don’t we? That’s how real and convincing they make it look. We Indians are, by nature, a sentimental lot. Sob stories sell quickly and touch a chord with us. We connect better with people who are leading hard, struggling lives, don’t we? Ever wondered why almost every participant in the hot seat on KBC is oh-so-terribly poor?

There was a time, in 90s, when Hindi serials were so interesting. There was so much happening. It felt like the whole industry was riding a new wave, trying to change mindsets, breaking free from many a orthodox boundaries, projecting new ideologies, giving progressive messages and showing a better way to lead life in general. I remember serials like Campus, Dekh Bhai Dekh, Hip Hip Hurray, Rishtey, Zabaan Sambhal ke, Antakshari and many more that excelled in their own genre.

When India was just about entering a phase of globalization and liberalization and coming to terms with the influx of foreign channels and their extremely ‘modern’ shows, Indian Telly behaved like it has to be on it toes always, to keep up with the foreign competition.  The Indian Telly content focused on urban India and its challenges. It showed women in a better light. They were modern, educated, chic, progressive in thoughts and willing to break barriers. They taught Indian women that they had every right to all things good. Just like men have. They dressed normally, like how you and I do in our routine every-day life. They didn’t wear hideous make up and wear excruciatingly heavy zari-mari  sarees, which women in today’s soaps wear. They lead realistic lives; they were fiercely independent and worked for a living.

In today’s soaps, what role a woman plays? She decks up to the nines for every single shot, wears an inch thick layer of makeup and is seen sashaying down the house doing what? Nothing. Or probably she is just scheming, plotting or making ploys with obvious loopholes to make even with her saas/devrani/jethani/doosri aurat. Basically, she is shown like she is someone who possesses ‘zero’ IQ and who is nothing more than some dolled-up pretty Barbie. If at all she is shown like she is cooking something in the kitchen (yes in that unbelievable heavy bridal-kind of outfit), she will just be stirring something at the most, to make it look a bit real.

At any point of time, she is shown to be in one of the following stages:

• Engaged
• About to be married
• Just married
• Expecting a child
• On the brink of divorce

The Tele-Wedding

Ya, Hindi serials revolve around marriages, engagements and pregnancies.  The zillion rasams and insanely ostentatious ceremonies make you feel like you are watching some wedding CD over and over again… Hum Aapke Hain Kaun style. They spin wonder stories and these extra-showy and flambuoyant marriages raise the bar for that poor middle-class Indian who wants to mindlessly ape these weddings and replicate the same in his daughter’s wedding.  Speaking of weddings, wedding industry is one of the biggest in India. Any doubt now why? Even in recession, this industry is hardly affected. That must say something about our obsession with big fat Indian weddings. Is there anyone who doesn’t love a big, blingy wedding? Coming back to the point, no wedding is shown without some shadow lurking over it. Some ex, some enemy, some secret person from the past is always waiting on the fence to pop his ugly head at the most inopportune time, just when the ‘dulhan’ is going to take her saat-pheras. How real, nay?

Ok, so once she does manage to get married without major glitches, she is forever embroiled in some larger-than-life and hard to believe drama. Or she is forever making sacrifices for the good of others. She delays her own happiness, and is willing to be misunderstood at every vital twist in the story (again if there is any). She won’t clarify things ever and lets them become messier with every passing day. She waits for time to do the right thing. After all, time heals everything, right?

And I don’t know why she is always so self-righteous and has at least a thousand morals and codes of conduct even when everyone else around her is being mean to her? She is very Sati-like really. She endures all torture and bears all brunt for things she didn’t do.

Oh yes, and not to forget, almost every Hindi serial is showing a picture of a very very sorry rural life. And even serials that show Indian urban lives have characters that behave in the most dehati fashion. And what I fail to understand is why are they always shown to be such big business tycoons? How many of us in real life are ‘that’ rich? They are all stinking rich on TV. But they almost never go to work, sparring a scene or two in a couple of months. Because they are forever embroiled in some mindless drama, where the solutions are so obvious even to a wench, but they elude them.

So much for reality!

After repeatedly watching this on TV, over every channel on every other show, I wonder what are the directors thinking? What are the actors thinking? Hell, what are the women thinking? It bothers me no end. Why not show women in a realistic light? Why not show her career oriented? Why not show her intelligent? Why not show her as someone who is real, who is not painfully perfect, someone who has flaws, someone who has human-like negative traits also? I have sworn off TV. I love channels like Travel and Living, NDTV Good Times, Food Food more.

I think shows in 90s were much superior and refreshing than what we see today. They had a rebellious streak in them. They wanted to see a developed India. They wanted to bring about a ‘change’.

What we see today is truck load of crap. And it is setting the country behind. Because a vast majority still lives in rural areas. And when they see these mindless soaps, they feel this is how rich and famous behave, this is how life in metros is. Can’t be farther from reality, can it?

P.S: And for heaven sake, women in India are not forever in the process of being married, or getting married, or having a baby, or getting divorced. Sigh! Is that all that happens in a woman’s life!

Here is a similar post I did right at the beginning of this humble blog.

Some Food for Thought

Few days ago, I had a chance to travel by our Mumbai local after quite a long time. It was crammed and noisy as usual and after a couple of minutes of wriggling and fighting to breathe, I finally did manage to get a place to sit. I had my music plugged into my ears, but the din outside was way too loud to hear the music without risking loss of my hearing. I turned it off and did the best thing that you can do in a train; stare randomly and kill time. Everyone was jostling for space and everyone was pushing everyone, and I sat between two tightly pressed bodies on either side. I couldn’t help overhear what the ladies, apparently two fellow commuters, were talking.

Lady with the yellow dupatta (hereafter referred as L1), ‘It’s really sad, how low one can stoop to make money.’

Restless lady with an irritatingly noisy polythene bag (hereafter referred as L2), ‘Yes indeed. These women have no morals, no dignity and absolutely no self-respect.’

L1: Exactly, how can you sleep with someone for money? It’s unimaginable to me.

L2: How can anyone choose prostitution as an option for making a living? There are hundred odd jobs these women could do to earn a respectable living.

L1: And because of these women, there is so much filth and dirt around us, the dark secrets of the city, the hidden alleys which are frequented by men who don’t think twice before cheating on their wives, for few minutes of their filthy pleasure.

L2: I would rather die than resort to those means, if it ever came to that.

L1: And I wouldn’t want to associate myself with any of these women, in anyway possible. It’s way too below my dignity.

L1: Anyway, to each his own. Did you see that movie Rowdy Rathore?

They continued their conversation but my mind had wandered off by then. These women seemed educated and respected, yet I was appalled to hear how shallow their views were. With all due respect to L1 and L2, who were nice respectful women and who had opportunities to choose a respectable life, they still didn’t have a right to talk about some other women without getting all their facts cleared. I didn’t like the tone of their conversation, or even their attitude, for that matter. Who were they to give character certificates, and who were they to decide who should die and who should struggle to survive. And had they ever bothered to get the other side of the story?

We live in a dynamic society and the societal labyrinth is as complex as complex can be. Just like in a food chain, everyone is playing their part here. Think of it as a movie, where everyone is assigned a role, however small. But until everyone plays their part to perfection, the movie is not quite complete.

Before we ridicule prostitutes and write them off as a mere speck of dirt mark on society, take a moment ladies, and realise that they might actually be doing a favour on us and to the society. If not for them, the other respectable women in the city might probably be living in the constant fear of being raped. If not for these women, the labourers and the drivers who are rarely home and always travelling and who are notorious for frequenting brothels and prostitutes would be roaming around freely looking at every woman as just a sex object. If not for these women, thousands of horny men who have no other option to satiate their hunger would be objectifyng every woman that crosses their path. Imagine what would happen if no body was playing that part. The balance would be disturbed and the repercussions would definitely show in some other part of the society.

So L1, you have an option of not sleeping for money, be glad, count your blessings and don’t sleep.

And L2, you would rather die than offer yourself for money; that is easier said than done. Be grateful that you never had to choose that. And if these women are valuing this wonderful gift of life above everything else, and are surviving by whatever means that they deem best, it’s their bloody right to choose LIFE above everything else.

By saying this, I am not advocating prostitution. I am not saying that we should honour these women with medals or that we should all befriend them. All I am saying is, at least let’s be tolerant of them. At least let’s not talk about them as if they have no more dignity than an insect. These women would have been at some sort of crossroads in their life when they decided to take up this profession (which by the way is very legal in many nations and rightly so). They would all have a story, they would all have been utterly helpless or out of all options to choose this. Many might have been forced into this by lecherous men and pimps. Many would want to go back to their old lives but they are unable to see any way out. Agreed, some women would do that out of choice, for money or for other reasons. So just as L1 rightly says, to each his own. Their life, their worry. Why should we also take away that little benefit of doubt as well? There might be reasons: lack of education, no opportunities, no guidance, they might be shouldering family responsibilities and feeding hungry mouths. In fact, we should salute their spirit to live and their desire to make best out of whatever life offered.

Not all human beings are good, just like how not all prostitutes are bad. We are a judgemental lot. No really, many of us are. We, Indians, love to jump to conclusions. We have always loved to compartmentalize and classify things/people into the boxes we have created in our mind over the years. These boxes have been created so that we can conform to the societal norms and common practices. So that we can all live together in a civilized, regulated society. And that is how it should be ideally, no arguing that. As long as these boxes or norms are aiding the progress of the society. All is well till we are able to do so. But hell breaks loose when we are not able to put those things/situations/people in to one of those boxes. When something doesn’t adhere to the normal, acceptable standards, it’s funny to see how we react.

My only urge, through this blog is, never rush to judge someone. Because we don’t know what life that someone is living or what situations that someone is facing. We hardly ever know the other side of the story. Thinking good, healthy and positive thoughts about others conveys nothing but your own positive disposition towards life.

Some food for thought, isn’t it?

A little gratitude…

I just realised that just how many things, we in metros enjoying a respectable lifestyle, take for granted. One of the things in that list, as many women would agree with me, is the role our house helps and maids play in our chaotic lives. This is indeed a luxury that comes at a super affordable price. Ask some busy professional in the US, who conducts board meetings by the day and washes dishes by the night. Because, only the super affluent class there affords to hire house helps.  But in India, we hire them at a price less than the meal for two would cost at any new-age restaurant.

In a city like Mumbai, where an average adult spends at least two hours travelling (in some cases people travel for about 5 hours daily) to and fro from work, having some kind of house help is indispensible. Otherwise, just how would an average women, who works for close to ten hours per day and travels for another two hours would manage to squeeze in everything in a day’s time. Just how much can she alone pack in, in a day? She wakes up when it’s still dark, rushes through her morning ablutions, prepares breakfast on one side and lunch on the other side for her family, wakes up the kids, dresses them up for school, packs their lunch, sends them to school, serves breakfast to her husband, tends to the needs of other elders in the family and quickly dresses up herself and dashes off to work. She puts in 10-11 hours chasing targets, meeting clients and meeting the requirements of a demanding job. After a tiring day at work, she also has to think about what to put on the dinner table, about kids’ homework, running pending errands and simultaneously fighting the guilt of not being able to do enough for her family. Not being a hands-on mom for her kids.

Not having any kind of domestic help to see her through the crazy day is unimaginable. The point I am trying to drive here is that we seldom acknowledge what an integral part our maids and house helps play in our lives and how much are we dependant on them for our own sanity. If our maids don’t turn up just one day, our entire calculated schedule goes for a toss. But how many times do we actually thank them for being our saviour? Forget being thankful, many people mistreat them, abuse them and misbehave with them. We forget that how handicapped we will be without their help.

My maid, Urmila, who comes in the afternoons to do the dishes and clean the house, is a really sweet woman. She is hardworking and committed. And poor. She is a mother of four tots who has to work her ass off in order to feed their little mouths. Needless to say, her husband is a good-for-nothing jerk who beats her, harasses her, pulls her by hair and comes home drunk every single day. He doesn’t earn a penny and lives off his poor wife’s earnings. He beats her black and blue if she denies him the money. Her children are petrified of him and he is no more than a liability on the family. A few days ago, she looked unusually quiet…because she is generally a warm chirpy woman. She quietly started doing the dishes but I could see her eyes were rimmed with tears. I asked her if everything was alright. And she could hold back her tears no longer. They started streaming down her face and she wept inconsolably. I offered her a glass of water and asked her to calm down. She wouldn’t say anything but I prodded her a bit. I was sure she only needed a little nudge to pour her heart out. She was crying because her body hurt. Her husband had caned her. And why? Because she made a phone call to her ailing father using his mobile. So in effect, she was hurt so badly just because she made a 30 paise phone call to her father. And not to forget that, it was her money that went into that mobile in the first place.

Her life is such a myriad of compromises and hardships that she hardly sees any light at the end of the tunnel.  She even confessed that she secretly wished for her husband to drink more alcohol and die early. At least, that would bring some relief. She wouldn’t launch a police complaint against him, because her mind is washed with useless morals that have been imbibed in her since her childhood. Or maybe the outside world seemed so dark to her, that she preferred to tolerate her inhuman husband than to survive on her own in her dark world. The slum she dwells in is not kind to single women. There is no dearth of man-leeches and psychos in her slum she said. So rather than fighting against her husband or lodging a complaint against him, she puts up with all his tantrums and autocracy just because she feels relatively secure in his presence. And she worries too much about her children’s security as well.

Why am I sharing all this? How does this concern all of us? What can we do?

I feel we all could little things to bring little comfort and dignity to their lives. Women like Urmila put up with all the crap because they are not empowered. They are uneducated. They feel it’s a part of woman’s destiny to endure all this.

What we could do is,

• for starters, be nice to them
• talk to them like they are human, because they are
• be approachable to them
• give them food with all the respect, not just the left overs
• educate them
• ask about their children and their needs
• tell them about their rights and powers
• on festivals and occasions, reward them, give them bonus
• give our old clothes to them, it would mean a lot to them
• offer to help them with lodging complaints etc, in case they want to take such an action
• educate them about savings, open a savings account for them
• give them a week off, they deserve a holiday too (and don’t be mean and cut off their wages, you wouldn’t become any richer by saving those Rs. 50-100)

There are so many things, which are of little or no value to us, but they could be invaluable to them. We could avoid buying one of the many useless things we buy, and buy them something useful with that money. All that is needed is a heart to empathise with them and to truly feel that their existence, indeed, adds value to our life.

You, the modern woman, are able to do all those things that your high profile corporate job and lifestyle demands only because all those nannies, care takers and women like Urmila do your dishes, clean your house, cook for your families and help you with all the mundane.

Think about it!

Girls and boys….contd…

As expected, my post on ‘Girls and Boys – Part 1’ had all my guy friends nodding in agreement and all my girl friends were furious and snickering at such a shallow typecasting.

Usually, boys/men are not really verbose. They are painfully direct and to the point. They really say, what they mean. Yes, I know that’s a hard truth to digest. Sigh! But that is usually the truth. Unlike us girls, they won’t sugar coat things, and build an entire scenario to come to the point. Hence, there is always the mismatch in coding and decoding between inter-gender communications. We, on one hand, never really say the exact things that we want, for the want of sounding not-rude, understanding, compassionate, reasonable, mature or whatever. They, on the other hand, are typically inapt at beating around the bush. But still there are many things typical of a man to say, when he CLEARLY means something else.

Ok girls, now listen up! Like I promised, we won’t be sparing the boys, and I will keep up to it. I am listing down some of the things that men say and what actually they mean. Please feel free to add to the list and let’s make it a real long one together. Wink!

What he says and what he means:

1. He says: I think I am falling for you/ I like your hair/shoes/etc.

 What he means: You really interest him. You are on his mind more often than he would like to acknowledge, even to himself.

Tip: It’s more likely that he is just testing the waters. It’s a pre-cursor to what he might really have in mind. He just wants to make sure that you are also riding the same wave as him. And if he proposes, he doesn’t want to face an embarrassing rejection. Girls, it’s your hint at knowing where you really want to take things with him.

2. He says: Why don’t you catch up with your girl gang today? Its been really long you met them.

What he means: He is not being very considerate and willing to look after the kids while you have your fun. He really wants to watch that football match over beer with his cronies. And he wants to have fun with his guy gang.

Tip: It’s just that he wants to go anyhow; today or in the next couple of days. If he lets you go out, obviously you won’t stop him from having his fun. It’s a pure bargain. Just calculative give and take. And hopefully no ulterior motive here. So, let him just go and you have your own fun too.

3. He says: Okay, let’s go for that movie.

What he means: I wouldn’t have gone for that movie under any circumstance. I am only going because you want.

Tip: Again a calculative game. He goes with you for that movie willingly so that you can’t put your foot down when he wants to go for some sci-fi or action flick.

Or it could also mean (in rare cases):

• He really wants you to be happy, even if that means going to that movie.
• He wants to make you happy, because he really loves you or wants you to take you to bed.
• He is just of a very accommodating nature and your happiness is his top most priority.

After a dinner date, he comes to drop you home

4. He says: (In case you are one of those girls, who live in their own house, away from parents)

Why don’t we sip some coffee together?

He means: I am sure you know what ‘coffee after dinner dates’ is a metaphor for.

Tip:  Haven’t we all watched this clichéd line in scores of Hollywood movies? He just wants to go to bed with you. Obviously, he can’t straight away tell you, ‘honey let’s just have sex and get done with it.’ So it’s a subtle cue, to gauge your interest. If things don’t turn out the way he thought, at least he can convince himself that he had just come for coffee. Real coffee.

5. He says: Let’s go out for dinner tonight.

 

What he means: If you are his wife: I am tired of all the inedible things you try to pass off as dinner.

If you are his girlfriend: I really like you and dinner is just to check if there could be any interesting possibilities between us.

 

Tip: Don’t let all his flattery charm you too much and take you off guard.

Side note: He might just have taken you out for dinner without any specific agenda. May be we should not let our women-minds over analyse the situation.

6. He says: You look different.

He means: He can’t exactly put his finger on what exactly is different. He didn’t exactly notice your hair cut.

Or he means you are looking bad. Different is a subtle way of saying that dress is unflattering.

Tip: Look right into his eyes and dare him to say clearly what is looking different.

If he is really one of those rare sensitive types, he doesn’t want to hurt you by saying that you are looking bad, right on your face. He wants you to take the cue.

 

7. He says: My mom’s choley/pasta/halwa is out of the world.

He means: Your choley/pasta/halwa doesn’t even come close. You suck at it.

Tip: Ouch! Yes, I know you put your whole evening making that dish. You just take it with a pinch of salt, smile back sweetly and say, “I am sure”.

 

So girls, I am looking forward to see some more ‘what-he-says-and-what-he-means’ comments down here.

 

Girls and boys

 

Wife: I am not upset.

Husband (believes that and sighs, thinking he is gonna get lucky tonight): Great, what are you making for dinner tonight?

Wife: #$#% #$%#%$

Husband (totally confused): What?

ROFL

It’s a known fact that the way men and women communicate is different in more than one ways. A slew of research proves this. There is a sea of difference in what women say and what men understand; and it holds equally true vice versa as well. Interestingly, more often than not, the intended meaning behind what they say to each other is always something else; something vague and unfathomable. Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus might be true after all.

What she says and what she means:

1. She says: There is nothing wrong.

What she means: Obviously there is something wrong, you jerk. Can’t you be a little sensitive for once?

Tip: Boys, on hearing this sentence, don’t just feel all is right and go back to your football game. Because if there was a negative marking for such a thing, your score which managed to be in double digits after years of understanding, could hit an all time low and come down straight to single digit.

The best part for you boys is that you don’t really have to have a dia-logue, or give any suggestions. You just have to listen well (or at least pretend), and let her cool off her steam. And look empathetic, nod in between (but don’t overdo please) and just agree to what she says. You might really get lucky at night.

2. She says: I think we need to talk.

What she means: Brace yourself up for a serious discussion. I am going to talk and you are going to listen.

 Tip: You thought you would be talking about how that movie is faring at the box office? LOL!

Boys whenever you feel that she has been letting you have your way for some time now, you can be assured that a silent storm is brewing. As the years go by, you will become instinctively tuned to this; and will be able to predict impending explosions almost correctly someday.

I wish I had a real tip to give. But I guess it has to be a gradual learning curve.

3. She asks: Am I looking fat?

What she means: She wants an assurance form you that she is not looking fat, and does not really want an honest answer.

Tip: Men, she wants to be assured that you will love her, no matter what her weight is, and that your love for her is not superficial. So even if she looks like a red box in that red dress, you can’t/ should not give an honest answer; even if she is looking at you with earnest eyes.

What you do instead is, say:

• You look great the way you are, and I wouldn’t want you to fret about your weight.
• You are not looking fat, you look curvier and I like you this way (White lies!!).
• Who said you are fat?? (feign total disbelief) (If you are convincing, she might get you back in double digits)
• You are not fat, you are just pleasantly plump. And there is more to love. (Men, this answer doesn’t work with every woman, know your type well or avoid this answer)

4. She says: I don’t know where the relationship is going.

What She means: I have had enough of cleaning your laundry and obliging all the time. You can’t treat me like a doormat and behave like I-can’t-be-bothered.

Tip: If she is your wife, you are in deep sh**. Probably you want to offer doing laundry henceforth or cleaning dishes. The smart husband is the one who chooses to do the chore his wife hates the most.

If she is your Girlfriend:

• She is either asking for a commitment (tell her that you were going to suggest this yourself, and you are glad that both of you are thinking the same.)
• Or she is so fed up of you that she just wants to dump you. (If she has made up her mind, I am afraid boys it’s too late. Nothing you say will make her stay.)

5. She says: Isn’t my friend Sarah really pretty? 

What She means: She wants to know if you are checking out her friends.

 Tip: it’s almost a catch-22 situation. And there can’t be perfect answer to this. If you say, she is pretty, that obviously means that you mean your own girl is not as pretty.

If you say that you never really checked her out, because you had your eyes glued on only her (your own girl), she will obviously figure you are lying.

Your best bet would be to divert her mind or excuse yourself.

Real meanings for her seemingly harmless words:

• I am really sorry – But you will be sorry soon
• Fine – nothing is fine
• Do what you like – Means you do what she told you to
• Aren’t these shoes pretty – my birthday is round the corner, make a mental note.
• Give me 5 minutes to dress up –  you may take a small nap
• Do you really love me? – I have something to confess.
• Did you like this dish – say yes, and if you say no, be prepared to eat out.
• Don’t argue – I am PMSing, leave me alone. Or just hug me and say you love me.

I would like to clarify, before I get a backlash from any of you girls, all is written in good humour and is highly stereotyped. 🙂 I know my friends are different.

Boys wait on: the next blog is, “what he says and what he means”

Girls: Wink, Wink.