Being a woman

What is like being a woman?

Being a woman is like being under constant pressure of looking beautiful, staying slim all the time, wanting to be tall, having lustrous thick hair, wearing pretty dresses, having waxed -hands and legs and what-not at all times; having blemish-free spotless, glowing skin, perfect red pout, elegant French-manicured hands, dainty feet…

It’s tough guys, it’s not easy. Sometimes it feels like we are pushed into a corner, and we can’t really help. After all, the glamour world and the fashion world have set the benchmarks so high, that we don’t really have a choice; and willingly or unwillingly, we get sucked into this madness.

Do you have any idea how much of our mind space this looking-pretty-staying-thin business takes? How much of our time it takes? How much efforts this costs? How much pain is to be endured? And not to forget, how big a hole this bores into our pockets? And all this for what? To match the high standards of photoshopped pictures and acceptable standards of a ‘desirable woman’? Just imagine how much more productive could we have been, if this place was cleared up for some inspiring and progressive ideas?

We are in 21st century and women have long proved their mettle. We are rubbing shoulders with men at NASA and we are also digging land with the male workers at construction sites. But accept it or not, even to this day, we are first judged on how pretty a picture we cut? Aren’t we? Why are we still so archaic in defining a woman’s beauty or her ‘desirable quotient’? There don’t have to be any standards of how an ideal woman should be like in first place, but if there still are, shouldn’t they at least evolve with time? Shouldn’t the parameters change?  It is rude, superficial and offensive to be always, always, always judged by our looks, beauty, and appearance. Go ahead, deny that. You will deny that, won’t you? But that won’t change the sad reality.

Billions of dollars are spent each year on cosmetic surgeries. That should explain that it’s really happening, right? Behind closed doors? Sometimes with open doors? May be there is a supply and hence there is a demand, or maybe there is demand, hence there is a supply? But there is a demand because there is pressure to fit in, to be accepted, to be liked, and to be considered. Viscous circle.

But we can change things at the grassroots’ level, I feel. Every woman can take charge of herself. Let us not get affected by these picture perfect beauties so much. It’s ok to want to look pretty, it’s ok to care about yourself, it’s ok to spend some time, money and effort on pampering ourselves. BUT IT’S NOT OKAY to let this become an obsession, our sole motto in life. There is more to us than this.

Men can start by being more tolerable about this and by not putting any pressure on their partners, if they are, that is. Don’t expect them to look like super models at all times. If they can manage that with minimalistic time, effort and money, great. Enjoy! But don’t fret if she doesn’t manage to knock-off her post pregnancy weight soon after, like how celebrities do. For celebrities, their bodies are their assets. They have to maintain it. But for a normal woman, there is much more to her.  There is a lot on her plate. More than she can manage. So if she talks about taking the unnatural, surgical route to beauty, please discourage her. Instead encourage her to be healthy. And healthy doesn’t always equals thin.

There is more to a person than looks. Even if that person is a woman.


4 thoughts on “Being a woman

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